BY ANDREW MORKES, FOUNDER AND AUTHOR OF “NATURE IN CHICAGOLAND” BLOG
I’m taking a break from nature stories to rememember my mom on her birthday (her 2025 birthday was her last one). Look for new nature in Chicagoland stories coming soon.
We couldn’t make my mom walk again. We couldn’t restore her overall health, which had been declining over the past few years, and which resulted in her being rushed to the hospital for sepsis and then her final five months at a nursing home. (At least it was a good nursing home in the hellscape that is the American healthcare system—unless you’re wealthy.)
But we could throw her a humdinger of an 85th birthday party in a beautiful nursing home party room that had floor-to-ceiling windows and a fireplace. And that’s what we did.
We celebrated my mom’s birthday on this day one year ago. (Her birthday is on July 28th, but we celebrated on the 26th due to guest logistics.)
My amazing baker son made blondies, blueberry loaf cake, brownies, zucchini bread, lemon cookies, and chocolate chip cookies. My wife kindly ordered a cake and helped me with the arrangements. I had fun reversing the “8” and “5” on the birthday cake to de-age my mom, but that’s another story. We decorated the room with streamers and Happy Birthday signs.
The guests arrived. My brother Tony (a fellow host), his sister-in-law Linda, Shirley and Art, Kathy, Mary, Julie, and Kelly. And, of course, my wife and son. My pal Vanessa visited my mom two days earlier and gave her a beautiful red blouse (red was my mom’s favorite color).
We ate tons of pizza and desserts, we laughed, and we sang Happy Birthday to my mom and she opened thoughtful presents.
Amidst the sometimes misery of being old and sick, there was joy, happiness, love, and support.
Buoyed by the support of her friends and family and the joy of celebration, my mother became her old self for a few hours. She smiled, made jokes, and had fun blowing out the candles. She looked healthier and more energetic than I’d seen her in a while.
Eventually, we had to say our goodbyes.
July 26, 2025, was a hinge moment for my mom. After the party, her health gradually declined, until she passed away in the first hour of September 25. I was with her, just as I had been with my dad 28 years earlier. It’s a solemn gift and a blessing from God to be able to be with and support your parents as they leave this world.
But we gave my mom a great birthday, and I know the excitement of the party cheered her both before and after that day. I’m so happy that she could receive the support of others and enjoy herself.
I don’t have any grand words of wisdom except that we should cherish our parents every day because, once they’re gone, the world is often a seemingly harsher place. They crave our calls, so we should call them—even it’s just for a few minutes to say hello. They love our visits, so we should find a way to visit as much as possible. And many (like my mom) loved sending cards, so we should send cards to our parents and embrace this lost art because cards have a lot more meaning (in most instances) than texts and emails.
Even though we knew it was coming, it is still shocking that my mom is no longer with us. She was in my life for 20,415 days, and then she was suddenly gone. But as the months have passed after my mom’s death, some of the painful memories of her last months are sliding away (and hopefully staying away). They’re being replaced by memories of her last birthday and other good times.
Here are two other stories about my mom, and a few about my dad:
12 Wonderful, Interesting, and Fun Things About My Mom
7 Stories About My Dad on Father’s Day
George’s Desk: A Story About My Dad on Father’s Day
Copyright (text/photos): © Andrew Morkes
Looking for some other great nature destinations in Chicagoland? If so, check out my book, Nature in Chicagoland: More Than 120 Fantastic Nature Destinations That You Must Visit. It features amazing destinations in Illinois, Indiana, Michigan, and Wisconsin. Click on the title to learn more. The book has 306 pages and 210+ photos and is only $19.99.
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ABOUT ANDREW MORKES
I’ve been a writer and editor for more than 30 years. I’m the founder of College & Career Press (2002); the author and publisher of The Morkes Report: College and Career Planning Trends blog; and the author and publisher of Hot Health Care Careers: 30 Occupations With Fast Growth and Many New Job Openings; Nontraditional Careers for Women and Men: More Than 30 Great Jobs for Women and Men With Apprenticeships Through PhDs; They Teach That in College!?: A Resource Guide to More Than 100 Interesting College Majors, which was selected as one of the best books of the year by the library journal Voice of Youth Advocates; and other titles. They Teach That in College!? provides more information on environmental- and sustainability-related majors such as Ecotourism, Range Management, Renewable Energy, Sustainability and the Built Environment, Sustainability Studies, and Sustainable Agriculture/Organic Farming. I also served as a member of the parent advisory board at my son’s school for five years.
In addition to these publications, I’ve written more than 80 books about careers for other publishing and media companies including Infobase (such as the venerable Encyclopedia of Careers & Vocational Guidance, College Readiness: The Vault Guide for High School Juniors and Seniors, the Vault Career Guide to Consulting, and many volumes in the Careers in Focus, Discovering Careers, What Can I Do Now?!, and Career Skills Library series), Lerner Publishing, and Mason Crest (including those in the Careers in the Building Trades, Hands-On Careers, Social Media Today, Woman in STEM Careers, Getting Started, and Cool Careers in Science series).
Here’s a list of the environmental- and clean energy-focused titles that I’ve written or co-written:
- Nature in Chicagoland: More Than 120 Fantastic Nature Destinations That You Must Visit
- Wind Turbine Technicians (Great Careers Without a Bachelor’s Degree series)
- Environmental Scientists (Cool Careers in Science series)
- Renewable Energy Careers (Cool Careers in Science series)
- Environment (Getting Started series)
- Solar Power Technicians (Careers in Infrastructure series)
- Women in Environmental Sciences (Women in STEM Careers)
Articles about my work have appeared in the Chicago Tribune, Chicago Sun-Times, Practical Homeschooling, and other publications. My photographs of musicians, artists, and the natural world have been published in several books. My poetry has been published in Cadence, Wisconsin Review, Poetry Motel, Strong Coffee, and Mid-America Review. As an amateur artist, I’m pleased to say that four of my paintings were included in the 2025 Beverly Art Walk.